Welcome Back to the United States
Welcome Back to the States and Broward College. We hope that you truly had an amazing adventure, filled with travel, new experiences, new friends, and stories to last a lifetime. We hope you have come back with new international insights, newfound points of view, and a clarity of self you never would have achieved had you not studied abroad.
"It's a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, feels the same, even smells the same. You realize what's changed is you." - F. Scott Fitzgerald
While everyone tells you that living in another country will be challenging and you expect to deal with cultural differences, you do not, however, expect to experience challenges when coming back "home." Surprisingly, coming home can present cultural adjustment obstacles; ones that can hit even harder because you never see them coming.
Studying abroad changes a person. In the decades Broward College has been working in study abroad, we have seen thousands of students return home. While pretty much everyone eventually finds their place back home, there is always a lasting change, and it can disrupt aspects of your life upon your return.
"Culture shock is the expected confrontation with the unfamiliar. Re-entry shock is the unexpected confrontation with the familiar." - R. Michael Paige (from Maximizing Study Abroad)
To help you better understand some of these changes and how to deal with them, please read through the eight immediate challenges of re-entry, followed by the nine overarching pieces of advice, and, finally, opportunities for those interested in going abroad again.
Eight Immediate Challenges of Re-Entry
After all the adventures and crazy new experiences while abroad, returning to "normal" life at home can often feel dull in comparison. When you were abroad, every weekend meant traveling to some new and exotic place. Each day you learn something new. You met fascinating characters from all over the world. The world was truly your oyster. Home just does not provide that kind of intense environment, but then again not much does, and to compare the two is unfair, to say the least.
Study Abroad was like riding a massive rollercoaster for weeks on end, while it is fun, it is not something you want to experience for the rest of your life. The key to helping you adapt is to put things into context and perspective. At home, you need to give yourself time to rediscover the enjoyable aspects of life there. Do not compare study abroad with life at home. The two each have their unique place in your life; find enjoyment in both.
When you return from abroad, you are like a kid returning from Disneyland. You are excited and want to tell EVERYONE about EVERYTHING you did. And at first, it is great. Your family and friends listen to you with interest, look at your photos, and react to your stories. It is wonderful. But then things quickly slide in the opposite direction. They no longer want to hear about your triumphs and adventures abroad. The problem is, that you still want to talk about them, and the fact that they no longer want to hear those stories can feel like a rejection of the new you and the things you love.
In this sense, you need to realize that too much of a good thing is no longer a good thing. Try to reduce your comparisons and try to reduce your comments that start with, "That reminds me of when I was in . . ." Know your audience and know when you are "sweeping a dirt floor," so to speak. If you truly want to continue telling your stories, then call your friends who studied abroad with you, talk to other students who have studied abroad (but be willing to swap stories), start a vlog, write a journal, and volunteer to talk about studying abroad.
All in all, you need to find another outlet; an outlet that hits new audiences.
If you have ever taken a photo of a beautiful sunset and then shown that photo to another person, you know the photo never quite captures truly how gorgeous that moment was or how amazing that sunset looked in real life. Well, the study abroad experience is pretty much the same thing. When you tell people about what it was like, words never seem to fit or do it justice. As Will Smith used to say, way back when he was a rapper, "Parents Just Do not Understand". But then again, how can they? They did not study abroad; they had no idea what it was like staying at that awesome hostel in Denmark, etc. What you need to realize is that this is ok. They were not there. You understand the "coolness" of everything you did and saw, and that is enough.
Now, this idea takes a little time to wrap your head around, but when you return "home," some students feel this desire to return BACK to their "home" - as in their host country. If you think about this, it makes sense. You made such an effort to figure out how to adapt to your host culture and, when you did, coming home felt like slamming on the breaks and going in reverse. It is not a great feeling, to be "discombobulated" (I love this word). You feel more comfortable in your host culture than you do back home. It does not make logical sense, but then again, most feelings do not make logical sense. Just know that this is normal, and with time, you will start to feel your center come back to your home.
As the old saying goes, "The only thing that is certain in life is change." And, when things change, so do your relationships. Whether that relationship is with your family, friends, or significant others, these relationships are now different upon your return. It will take time, and re-adjustments are needed on both sides to develop a new understanding of each other. The reality is some of your closest friends may no longer be close friends Breakups in relationships are very common when you return. Either you changed, they changed, or you both changed and now you or they want to walk separate paths. While this can be difficult, it is part of life. Studying abroad often amplifies change.
The fact is most relationships (families usually being the exception) do not survive study abroad. But when you think about it, most relationships do not survive anyway. Those that do usually end in marriage or a lifelong bond, and these are very few and far between. Those that do survive do so because both parties are willing to adapt, accept the differences and find new ways of connecting. Advising on this can be challenging because relationships that do not survive are tough for everyone. Just understand that, over time, things often happen for a reason, and, in the end, things work out for the best, even if they do not feel like it at the time.
With distance and time, we tend to romanticize things. In our heads, we highlight the great things and minimize or forget about the negative ones. This can happen when you return home. The images and ideas you had of home do not end up matching with reality, and this can hit you hard. Your reaction to reality can make you critical of things and people at home. You need to be careful with this because your reactions during this time can hurt the people you care about most.
If you remember, while abroad, there was a moment when you hated being in your host culture. Everything was different, you compared what the "foreigners" did to the U.S., and the U.S. was, of course, better. This was the second stage of cultural adjustment, and in your frustration, you wanted to lash out. You need to be aware of what you are going through and find an outlet that does not involve complaining or venting on people most dear to you. They will not understand, and it will often lead to arguments and hurt feelings. You can vent to other study-abroad students, a therapist, your study-abroad advisor, and even a stranger, but avoid doing this with people closest to you.
As your life progresses back home, you will inevitably start to lose aspects of your study abroad experience. This happens with everything in life. But, like the loss of people we care about, it can hit you a little harder. Studying abroad will probably rank among the top five things you have experienced in life. It is something we do not WANT to forget, and when we do, it saddens us. Some fill this sadness by trying to recreate the experience and go abroad again. Some create photo albums or vlogs to immortalize the experience. Others still seek jobs that keep the idea of studying abroad prominent. Just know that, like everything, details of what happened will likely fade, but the core emotions from the experience, the lessons learned, will be with you always.
Nine Overarching Pieces of Advice to Cope with Re-Entry Shock
- Acknowledge to yourself and others that you have changed, and understand this is normal. Take some time and reflect on the "new" you.
- Share your stories, emotions, and experiences with your family and friends. Just be cognizant of how much you share. You can overload them with repetition of stories and comparisons to your life abroad.
- Stay in touch and interact directly with those who shared your abroad experience. Call them instead of just texting. They can relate to what you are going through better than anyone else.
- Seek out diaspora communities from your country living near you. Look for local language groups (like Stammtisch) where you can speak the language. Find groups that play sports popular in your host country (e.g., Padel, Rugby). In the United States, you can often find pockets of natives from your host country living here, which can be the next best thing if you cannot return to Spain, Austria, or Costa Rica.
- Keep an open mind and perspective on the differences between the U.S. and your host country. Remember that you have a unique understanding because you have lived in both cultures. Unlike others, you comprehend both cultural perspectives.
- Educate yourself about "reverse culture shock" by reading articles and learning more about this experience. Understanding it can help you successfully navigate this stage.
- Volunteer with your school's study abroad office (yes, this is a shameless plug, but it is also the truth). When your family and friends grow weary of your stories, share them with others who are looking to go abroad. Encourage them to step out of their comfort zone.
- Preserve your memories by starting a travel blog, filming a vlog, creating a photo album, writing a journal, or establishing a YouTube channel or TikTok account. It doesn't matter if anyone follows you; you are doing this for yourself.
- Pay it forward: Help yourself regain balance by helping others. Offer to teach English to foreigners, be an American "buddy" to an international living in the U.S., discuss hosting an exchange student with your parents, volunteer with an NGO, or get involved in the international community in your city.
How Long Does Reverse Culture Shock Last?
The honest answer is that no one truly knows. It depends on several factors such as the individual (you), the duration of your time abroad, how integrated the program was, and how much you identified with your host culture. Most students who go abroad over the summer or on a short, faculty-led program, may not experience reverse culture shock at all or only to a minimal extent. However, if you spent a semester or academic year abroad, the longer duration likely required more adjustments, and transitioning back into your life at home could take longer.
If you spent time interacting with locals or international students rather than primarily with other Americans, your adjustment period might be extended. According to literature, it generally takes three to six months for a person to fully readjust to life in the United States and to rewire their brain to form new habits and behaviors.
The key thing to understand is that adjustment will happen; it simply takes time.
YES . . . Let's Do It Again
For many of you, the travel bug is now a permanent fixture woven into your DNA. So . . . if you are looking for a way to go back, here are some opportunities you should look into:
Peace Corps: This is a grass-roots volunteer program designed to be hands-on and create a lasting impact. The program is often called life-defining and volunteers get to work on projects ranging from education to business development.
Fulbright: The Fulbright Scholar Program is one of the most prestigious exchange programs in the world. It is a highly competitive international grant given to students, scholars, professors, and young professionals to study, research, or teach overseas. Under the Fulbright scholarship, graduating seniors are allowed to study abroad for one year.
CBYX Young Professionals Program: The Congress-Bundestag Youth Exchange for Young Professionals is a fellowship funded by the German Bundestag and the U.S. Department of State which annually provides the exchange of 75 American and 75 German young professionals, the opportunity to spend one year in each other's countries studying, and interning and through a culturally immersive program.
CLS (Critical Language Scholarship Program): If students love learning new languages, then this program would be a perfect fit. The U.S. State Department sponsors this program to expand Americans' mastery of foreign languages critical to national security and engagement with the world. The program focuses on assisting students to learn languages not commonly learned in the U.S. (for example, Japanese, Arabic, Chinese, Korean, Russian, Urdu, Turkish, Swahili, Portuguese, Persian, Indonesian, Hindi, and Azerbaijani).
JET (Japan Exchange and Teaching Program): This is a well-established program (1987) designed and sponsored by the Japanese government to assist Japanese students in learning English by hiring English native speakers to work in public and private schools. The program seeks out individuals who are adaptable, outgoing, and who have a deep interest in Japan. Participants receive a salary and benefits.
EPIK (English Program in Korea): Established in 1995, this is a long-standing program for teaching English and is sponsored by the South Korean government. Participants assist Korean students and teachers within Korean public schools (elementary, middle, or high school). Participants receive a salary and benefits.
NALCAP (North American Language and Culture Assistants Program): This Spanish Government program partners with elementary and secondary schools in Spain to bolster English language programs by offering English Native Speakers the chance to work as language assistants within the school. Placements are offered across Spain, in practically every city and town. Selected participants will receive a monthly stipend of €800 to €1,000 for living experiences as well as health insurance.